Friday, June 13, 2014

"Please don't fight these hands that are holding you..."

Recently I have found music that has made me stop and think. Which, quite frankly, isn't that uncommon. In fact I would say it's more common than not that I learn about my relationship with God through music. My roommate (who actually hasn't been my roommate for 2 years but I still call her that) says it's funny, because lyrics have always been a thing for us. It's always been a way that we receive clarity, inspiration, peace, and joy. I guess it would make sense that the Lord would make use of that.

So here I am....

In Canada.

A missionary.

Struggling with ups and downs.

And listening to music to find peace. 

"Why are you looking for love? Why are you still if I'm not enough? Please don't fight these hands that are holding you..."

Oh hey there, Heavenly Father..

I think the thing that hit me hardest about those lyrics was the question: "Why are you still searching as if I'm not enough?" He is enough. He is everything. And in my human weakness I fail to see that most of the time. I think maybe sometimes I break His heart just a bit with the way I casually turn to everyone but Him for the answers to my questions, problems, fears, and frustrations.

"To where will you go, child?"

I don't know. I don't know where I would go. His arms are safest. His heart provides the most comfort.

I don't know why I would choose to go anywhere else.

But I do.

I should fix that.

Alright. Off to be someone's missionary, and maybe ponder life as I know it a little more carefully.

Love you all.

With Love, from Can-Win.

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